Driving Off Cliffs

Dear Hedgecock/UC Shuffle,

Let's count this as a suicide note. I've had a good life, full of laughs, and I just wanted to share the laughs with the NMU campus. I don't understand why, if we were approved for sweet sweet funds, I have to visit at least five offices with mutliple forms, steal fax privileges from my workplace, make multiple calls to Austin, Texas, and prepare cyanide to kill myself. I'm sorry I've never organized an event. I'm sorry I don't know how this fucking run around works. I'm sorry I didn't realize it would take at least ten hours of my time to get the funds I was told were mine. I used to tolerate you with good humor, but now I am too stressed to enjoy the humor I have worked to bring.

You'll regret this when I'm swinging from the rafters,
- Co-producer

PS - What the hell is with the monkey-like ladies hiding out in the basement, typing stuff and giving out mystery checks!?